is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
I just used a tire swing as a toilet. I think I'm gonna pass out here so I can see the look on the first kid who uses it in the morning.
swears the blind dude on this train is faking. Every day he stumbles and falls into a different girl's lap and then has to grab her tits to steady himself.
You need to tell your booty call to take some sudafed or something. I swear I thought you were humping Kermit the frog last night
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
Remember last NYE when after the 9th shot of tequila you went on full crazy mode and made out with the 50 y/o doorkeeper? and he called you the next day?
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
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