its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
Haha crisis adverted. Just told my dad I need to bone this guy. Nbd. He totes understands
he broke off your car antennae to use as a walking stick before he smoked because he claimed to lack the facial strength needed to open his eyes when he's high
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
I am a good friend because I got you a bagel. I am a bad friend because I ate half of it.
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
He wore the same cologne as my orthodontist so all I could think about was how I hadn't worn my retainer in months
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
Randomize
