i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
Waking and baking in my bathtub. In a giant sweater. And no pants. This is going to be the best 420 ever.
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
you know, i'm always afraid you're going to think i only want you for sex because i only text you when i'm horny
speaking of, guess what i'm thinking about
It's not even 6 am and I've already told my mom to fuck herself in the face
It's like fucking tetris in this bed
I JUST REALIZED THAT SINCE LEIA IS TECHNICALLY A PRINCESS AND KYLO REN IS HER SON AND STAR WARS IS OWNED BY DISNEY...KYLO REN IS LITERALLY A DISNEY PRINCE.
Oh my Gods. Why. Why did you have to tell me that. D:
SO YOU CAN SUFFER HAVING THAT KNOWLEDGE TOO.
Hey I'm at the gym and I need your personal trainer help. Also can you send me that picture of me eating a sausage. I want to post it on instgram.
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
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