I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
I definitely managed to work the word "aforementioned" into the conversation.. At least I'm an intelligent sexter.
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
Holy christ fuck what has my trainwreck of a life come to just blew a 17 year old so help me god
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
This girl I interned with got engaged today and I'm just like over here taking plan B with my tacos and PBR.
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
Randomize
