The girls stopped by my apartment. They caught me naked with a nearly empty bottle of vodka in one hand, drawing crop circles in the carpet with the vacuum.
my sisters under your porch take her home
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
Tried to dry my shoes in the oven last night.
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
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