How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
She went to the bathroom before i broke up with her so i changed all 2500 of her songs on her computer to "I'm a cheating whore"
I'm on the strip, it's like a mini new years eve. Some girl just got taken away on a stretcher with her meter margarita in her hand claiming it's trophy for being awesome. Damn tourists are lightweights.
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
He told me that I smelled like a Glade Plug-in, then sang the Menard's jingle in it's entirety in between kissing me.
Remember when we used to share painkillers at parties? Now we're dealing in blood pressure pills. Oh, how the mighty have fallen.
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
Randomize
