He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
He started to notice that i sleep with every girl he calls dibs on.
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
You were drink-wine-from-the-bottle drunk trying to take everybody's blood pressures again.
Tried to put an eye patch on while hooking up with a girl. She was not amused.
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
Randomize