OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
I just had to remind myself that I'm visible in real life. Sitting in the car in a parking lot, and almost took my shirt off because the tag is itchy and I wanted it off... and you know I don't wear bras...
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
FUCK the WHO, FUCK cancer, I'm gonna eat fucking bacon.
It's 7am. I'm making pizza & watching the Matrix. I will not be bothered.
To answer your next question, yes, I'm drunk.
I’m going to give his broken heart CPR with my vagina
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