I hate fucking guys that don't drink coffee. My morning hangover and shame will not be cured by your stupid tea.
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
so i literally woke up after a night of doing lines to a bag of pretzels falling off my bed. a reminder that maybe this is a contributing factor to my freshman 15.
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
your fucking longboard fell on me while we were having sex you fucking hipster
Randomize
