i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
Being pregnant is so damn inconvenient for my sex life.
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
I never thought I would have to get vodka suctioned out of my ear
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
I didn't know what to do so I panicked and puked in my pillowcase with my pillow still inside.
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
Shhhh less advice, more soothing words and dirty phrases
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
Randomize
