No stitches, just platelets and will power
I need to move out. I just walk of shamed my way into a family breakfast party. There's no response when grandma says "where you coming from in heels at 9AM?"
i just remember sitting on this bed, naked, STILL WITH A CONDOM ON, and suddenly these random girls were in the room shouting at me
I cant yet im literally covered in lube but I will later
I told her that I was going up to my room to lay in front of a fan without pants on, watching Avengers and she still wanted to get with me. I have to marry her.
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
No actually you're a pro. You puked on the cab ride, and managed to completely contain it in your purse. the cabbie was even impressed.
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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