Are you for fucking real.? He divorced me just because he got a fucking girlfriend.?!
Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
He asked me what I wanted the cake to say and I then asked him if "I'm sorry for throwing up in your bed last night" was too long. He said it was...
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
i'm not sure what happened last night.. i do remember the police calling me to find out where i was because apparently at some point i went missing? don't worry though. they found me
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
I had tater tots and weed with a stripper at 4am who compared the size of my boob to her head because fuck you my life rocks
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
I went to the hospital to have my arm checked out, and they already knew the story. They gave me props for posting photos on facebook before even coming to the hospital.
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
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