Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
Might as well permanently tattoo lush somewhere on my body and show it to people when I decide to drink so they won't serve me.
Worst drunk idea ever... Me "Cops are looking for two guys, one in a grey shirt one in a blue shirt" jelly "lets take out shirts off they'll never find us" of course I thought it was brilliant
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
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