So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
I don't think he's ever woke up with a paraplegic stripper sitting on his face before.
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
Ur gonna wake up early as dick tomorrow to do some responsible shit but im the one up at 3 am right now cooking brats soaked in keystone light so fuck your falling asleep ass bitch
Ran into his mom at the bar, i told her "i know he's married now but I'd still do him"
nothing says "functioning mature adult" like sneaking beer out of your mom's fridge in a lunchbox
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
My dad found me naked curled up under a towel on the couch with a fucking tub of butter and a spoon. Ambien Mondays are dead
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
I legitimately just had to leave work because I am too hungover. The front office ladies keep making fun of me.
I climbed on the arm of the futon, flapping my hand fan frantically and hissing imprecations at the smoke detector
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