I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
I love how my cats smell like pot.
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
Remind me to tell you all about the topless girl on the street who attempted to taze me.
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
You know that thing where you wouldn't typically eat ass but you're in love with him so you want to eat his ass, because it's HIS ass
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
Randomize