I feel like I'm in dance class right now
Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
fuck the hobbit
what about unicorns?
fuck those pointy horses
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
Just seeing my phone say "picture message from: Senor Floppy Cock", i knew it was going to make me smile.
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
I just witnessed Grandma making her infamous daiquiris. Extraordinary.
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
You wouldn't know anything about the tooth on ice in my freezer would you?
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
I heard the bride mutter "I should have brought a fucking tranquilizer". I'm not at all surprised that you got banned from the bar afterwards.
He had all the grace of a fucking hippo and the emotional control of a five year old
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
Randomize
