UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
These tits shall not be calmed
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
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