Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
Someone took a picture of their balls on my phone last night. BEAUTIFUL PACKAGE. I will find this man.
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
What kind of paramedic is he, some dude is dying back there and he's trying to get laid
I may forget my underwear, but you can count on me for drugs and plan b
So it turns out high me is very efficient. I set 5 alarms to remind me to do things, i made mac and cheese, and i wrote a poem. I'm going places.
Never thought I’d use my computer science degree for teledildonics, but here I am
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