I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
New wedding record, my shirt was off by 8pm!!!
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
Remember the Giant sandworm from the movie Dune? Well that's about how big his dick is. No bulshit.
Randomize
