i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
Nothing says "I mean business" like using a cart at the liquor store.
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
Oh and sorry for almost killing all of us last night... twice...
I gotta do like a month's worth of catch-up personal hygiene today in prep for Christmas so extended family doesn't ask if I'm depressed.
Randomize
