She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
the only time i'm productive on weed is when i drink.
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
Is it penis luge time yet?
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
told our landlord the hole in the wall was from your head during drunk sex..
how did he take it?
not as well as i would have thought
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
Randomize
