you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
Benefits of having to stay in jail for the weekend: learned how to make my own make up out of colored pencils. Also how to make use of toothpaste for hair products. Downfall was probably getting hit on by a murderer. Only me.
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
i can't even hate his new girlfriend cuz she survived a fucking brain tumor. like that's just not fair.
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
It's your last night of vacation right? Be the Oprah of dick. And you get a dick... and you get a dick, and you get a dick!!!
Was picked up in the middle of a bar full of people...apparently I'm not tall enough to reach for drunken makeouts. I'm proud of myself.
Did you happen to find the other half of my bra last night?
breakfast this morning: omelette, Valium and baileys hot chocolate
Now that sounds like the breakfast of champions
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