Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
I woke up wearing nothing but his lifeguard whistle..
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
Randomize