what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
We're trying to decide between cracker barrel an the ER
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
Matt you can be anything you want to be. Including the awesome guy that brings pizza to a bunch of stoned and sorta drunk kids.
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
I was trying to type "I just want you naked" and it put "I just want you baked"
Randomize
