Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
I found a bag of weed while packing. Now packing is like creating tiny universes inside of boxes.
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
I think I found my saving grace in the form of a beard at the bar.
If the amount of time the owner spent looking at my tits is any indication, I’d say I can probably sleep my way to the top
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
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