3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
"You're the only girl I haven't made out with yet" = worst pick up line ever
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
Drunk me also decided it would be funny to change all the passwords on my computer last night. Now I can't log into anything.
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
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