If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
For future reference "I'm too drunk to come today" is an acceptable line to get out of work. I love my job
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
Is it inappropriate to send a happy 3-year anniversary of having a threesome with you and your ex girlfriend on easter text?
I fell into a manhole last night, so there's that
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
My boss stocked the communal fridge with Gatorade. It's like he wants me to come in hungover.
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
Randomize
