No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
Apparently I joined a band last night. Definitely my favorite blackout.
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
I'm smoking a bowl in my bathtub. I'm meant to be alone.
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
My ex's girlfriend just invited me clubbing. Guess who won the breakup?
Randomize
