We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
Bring single women, or taken women who are unhappy with their relationships, or women who are happy with their relationships but have low moral standards, or women who just like to remove clothing when drunk (relationship status is unimportant for this option)
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
You caught me at a bad time. I'm stoned enough that I'm ready to sleep but also not stoned enough that I wanna smoke again but also stoned enough to not wanna drive anywhere
Seriously considering modifying my computer case so it can dispense wine. I need to make a bunch of changes and reorganize it's guts anyway....
Well I mean he still had sex with me after I told him that I play fetch with the kids I take care of, so I'm not really looking too far ahead with him...
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
Randomize