Remember that one time i smeared period blood on your face?
I hate you
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
He's living a porn movie. He's slept with a waitress at her work for lunch, a bar tender at the bar that night, and the cleaning lady the next morning.
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
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