im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
i feel like after you turn 30 you aren't supposed to black out anymore
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
I told my mom Jesus would want me to snort drugs on his birthday
Randomize
