apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
He kept saying it was because he was allergic to the chicken. Then he threw up on my mom.
Just ran into that guy that tried to take a dump in your pool
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
I just face planted on a condom wrapper in my bed...thought of you.
You're so romantic.
Wearing rip off pants to a booty call last night was one of my most brilliant ideas ever.
I just want to sit my fat ass down at McDonald's and never leave
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
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