remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
he proceeded to punch 3 mailboxes in a row and when i asked him why, he said "because they were talking shit"... i need a new boyfriend. and a new life.
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
WTF WHY ARE YOU STILL NOT DOING A BEER BONG?! THE TOILET CLOG CAN WAIT
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
I am currently exfoliating my skin with the toilet. We've never been so close.
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
Randomize
