I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
why are there beer bottles in my dishwasher?
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
my dentist asked me why my tooth was chipped, i told him i couldn't remember. i think he understands.
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
Trying to put a fitted sheet on drunk is one of the boss levels of slutty adulthood.
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
Can you bring me the toilet please
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
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