Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
You know how there are wrinkles in your brain? What if they were filled with potato chips? That's kind of how my head feels now.
Went to bed with a bowl of spaghetti O's on my chest, I make my own breakfast in bed. New level of laziness
You better be Eskimo Brother-ing the FUCK out of tonight right now. Long distance 'balls deep' high five
either I'm really high or that last bong rip tasted like christmas
fries before guys. food before dudes. shakes before dates. chips before dicks. lemon bars before football stars. macaroni before screwin' tony. what i'm saying is please come to ladies' night
No ambien sex tonight. I just ate two hotdogs with chilli and onions.
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
Randomize
