PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
I'd like to come home and be able to sleep in a bed that's not filled with crumbs from you getting too high and passing out while eating. This is seriously getting ridiculous.
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
im actually so stoned and hungover i feel like a bag of jello stuffed into a human shape
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
This lady gave me four cups to go along with my gallon of daiquiri. Silly girl, all I need is a straw.
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
I was just giving a mobile app demo to a client, on my iPhone, when a reminder alert appeared across the page blinking "12pm: go home and give John head". You're an asshole
Hahaha oops.
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
I think people are normalizing furries
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Randomize
