I just wanna be some guy's midlife crisis
I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network.
He was probably pissed, but i couldn't tell for sure. How pissed can someone really look while holding a fishbowl mimosa?
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
Randomize
