no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
and in the morning, while we were eating breakfast, she was all " i think someone sneezed into my shirt..." she'll never know.
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
She's making her own pesto again. Cooking spaghetti in the microwave and "frying" vegetables in the toaster oven. All this while wearing the yellow rubber gloves and saying that the pesto has feelings like a real person. Im terrified.
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
I spent ten minutes questioning her on what kind of cup she wanted... Then I asked what kind of water she wanted..
WOAH TOO HIGH
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
My old dealer would be proud of the drug cocktail I just took for my back pain.
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
I know it's 10:30am but Finding Dory starts in an hour, and I have four points of molly. You down?
I told the cop I was late for a booty call. He still gave me a ticket but he wrote his number on it
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