good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
This is my last and worst hangover of the decade...I almost cherrish it
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
What's the rule on cocaine before dinner?
Its 11 o'clock somewhere
He answered his phone while he was eating me out and proceeded to yell at his wife for interrupting lunch...impressed or rock bottom?
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
It's embarrassing enough people in my life are aware of the ridiculous things that happen to me. I don't think we need to get the whole world involved.
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
What the hell happened to the sandwich meat I just bought?
After you smoked, you made 8 ham sandwiches.
Guess that explains the mysterious disappearance of the bread...
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
Randomize
