Did I tell you he has dinosaur sheets?
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
You know it's been a good thanksgiving when you pee all over your own hands.
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
body shots are frowned upon at family weddings. i'll keep that in mind next time. maybe.
All I've consumed in the last 24 hours is cranberry vodka and kosher for passover biscotti
That's what happens when you party with the tribe
After an hour of searching for my pants, we had three people looking. They were finally found in the oven.
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
I'm at work behind the bar and just washed my mouth out with rumple bc I don't have a toothbrush. This may be a new low.
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