But, I don't have the body of a porn star, so nobody would hire me. Unless they're doing like a trip to the safari and they need an albino rhino
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
He fucked me for my Netflix login, I fucked him for his HBO login, and actually I think that's beautiful
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
You know that text I sent you last night at 2? That was 5 minutes before I ran face first into a wall of not okay
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
I was so drunk I got motion sickness from sex.
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
Randomize
