she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
You were pouring Patron into the window of the squad car trying to get the police dog to drink it
So thats why that cop beat my ass?
Probably
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
Randomize
