can we get nightvision for the apartment?
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
My alcohol tolerance is way too high for this paycheck.
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
Oh shit. The hangover. It has taken 20 mins and 5 attempts to tie my shoelaces
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
I need to go to St. Louis more often. The brides sorority sisters were practically fighting over me once they heard I work on Wall St.
Randomize
