I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
So after I was tied with a feather boa he left me there with KFC and cherry coke
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
I AM OFFERING YOU ALCOHOL AND THE CHANCE TO LET ME SAY FUCK IT TO MY RESPONSIBILITIES. HOW MANY TIMES DOES THIS HAPPEN?!
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
we need to invent and abuse teleportation
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
I had a dream that we had an entire sofa made out of cocaine.
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
Randomize