i just realized Britney Spears and I are more alike than I thought. Both of us have our parents in complete control of our lives, we both have restraining orders on previous boyfriends, and we all know both of us can put on a hell of a show
Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
My landlord wasn't pleased about the new fire pit we built him.
so the plumber came, he found condoms, feathers and glitter in the pipes.
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
Just met my future wife. Please dont fuck her.
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
Randomize
