hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
in hindsight, the duct tape banana hammock was a bad idea.
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
Hiding the dark circles under my eyes this morning was like trying to hide a Beached Whale on the Couch eating Pita chips.
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
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