The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
**i WaNt TO sLaP mY niECe wHO ThINks iT iS cUte tO WriTE LiKE tHiS**
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
was it me or did you scream 'champagne motherfucker' when you punched him in the face ??
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
Currently googling hangover cures, which looks a lot like working from the perspective of my boss.
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
My manager is trying to help me find a good career path, and I'm trying to find a professional way to tell him I just wanna smoke and fuck.
Randomize
