i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
I climb out of my sunroof. I mean its kind of embarrassing but part of me feels awesome and ninja like.
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
He's like the houdini of condoms. I never even realized he put one on before we fucked. he's magical.
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
i just found this napkin with your number on it in my jacket pocket. it reads amy, drawing of a wine bottle and a house
Yeah. Rock bottom was him passing out and saying "are you putting a condom on me?" and me covering his mouth and saying shhhhh
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
I think we might need a safe word for this...
Randomize
