For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
Found her in the closet eating mayo out of the jar with a knife
I can't believe I am actually paying for a night in a hotel for my parents so I can throw a party the night before Christmas Eve. I also can't believe they think it's their Christmas present.
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
What the fuck is wrong with your family? Why do you have unfrosted pop tarts.
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
I just had a dream that I was fighting Donald Trump... Gotta stop watching the news before bed
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
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