Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
She's popping painkillers like they're tic tacs and singing the soundtrack to dreamgirls. It's you're turn to babysit her.
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
Next time I try to break into the police station drunk, please stop me.
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
I was walking out of the bar when he said I'll see you later and I said I'll see you in my dreams and then fell face first and broke my nose
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
No, he came home, unscrewed all of the lightbulbs, and threw them in the sink.
Randomize
