Minivans at bars can only lead to bad things.
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
he literally referred to his penis as the alaskan bull worm from spongebob. when can we get married
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
Have you ever eaten pizza and gotten your dick sucked at the same time? Because I have pizza.
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
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