The midget we rented got so drunk last night he got carted off in an ambulance
No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
i was gonna tell him a really embarassing story about you, but then i remembered im in all of them
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
Her ex wouldn't stop texting her so she started replying with various pictures of Britney spears's breakdown
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
We just fucked in the park on a bench and a guy with a dog walked past us and the dog walked right up to us while the guy stared at his phone.
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